Dear Girl Who Walked Away,
It’s not like you weren’t aware
of what you were getting yourself into. He told you he was nice. He trusted
easily and gave you all he could when he could.
The nice guy believes in doing
things right. He was there when you needed him to be, and he went out of his
way to make sure you knew just how much you could mean to someone.
We live in a generation where
we all have to wear masks and play parts to make it through the battlefield of
dating in the 21st century. There is no such thing as giving it your all.
We like quotes on Facebook and
post things on Instagram stating we want the masochist one day and the romantic
the next. We play these games where being available can only happen sometimes,
and playing hard-to-get must be our number one priority. Why?
I thought the ultimate goal was
to eventually settle down. I mean, what is the point of dating if you have no
desire for it to go anywhere? If a one-night stand is what you’re looking for,
leave the good guys alone and toy within the levels you lay down.
Save yourself time and energy
because the good guy isn’t going to make it easy to just walk away. The good
guy cares, so he’ll get his explanation from you even though he knows it’ll be
a load of bull.
Every girl says she likes the
assh*le because he’s the challenge — the one she must break, train and force to
be more than just a douchebag . Have you ever thought, however, maybe you were
the girl in need of learning what it means to actually feel again?
You went through something,
like we all do, and because of it you changed. It’s normal and heartbreak
happens, but the next assh*le didn’t fix what the first one did; he kept it the
same or made it worse. His priority was not you and couldn’t be you. So now
you’re bitter and closed off from anything remotely more satisfying than a
one-night stand.
I won’t deny that the assh*le
is fun or that a good time isn’t promised with him, but when it’s all said and
done, is it ever more than just a good time? Probably not.
In fact, the assh*le has a
charm about him; it’s the charm you justify your pursuit with. You say,
“There’s just something about him.” However, it’s probably the same quality
that ended up hurting you in the past.
So you tried to push the nice
guy away. When he wouldn’t go away, you pushed harder. Still, he didn’t give up
and every time you pushed harder, he pulled you in even more.
He ignored your fears and
forced you to grow; he fought for your passions when you were too busy writing
them off. He forgot your wants and focused on everything you needed. Then you
walked away because he was too nice.
He gave you too much of
everything you wanted, and life got too easy. You wanted conflict and hardship
as if everything else in life did not promise you an endless journey of just
that. This is where you failed.
The nice guy has been hurt,
too, he just chose to stay nice. He learned that different people were going to
provide him different things in life. The nice guy also chose not to let any of
it change who he was.
So, he let you walk away and he
called it a day. Everyone always says there are plenty of fish in the sea, and
he let you go knowing this, even though it hurt.
What you don’t know is that
someone else is out there, and she won’t be as foolish you. When you realize
all you really want is the nice guy who cares about you too much, it’s going to
be too late. Some other girl will be able to see how great he is, and she won’t
waste a minute.
So you lost your Ted Mosby and,
I promise, to him you were Robin. The nice guys are there to give you a break,
a light to something more than the games we identify our generation with .
He may have loved you too soon
and it was too crazy and too much, but guys like Mosby don’t happen every day;
they happen never . He got you the blue French horn, and he made you feel love
when love was no longer a part of your vocabulary. You were now saying “I love
you” again and remembering what it felt like.
He was the guy you were
supposed to end up with, who makes everything change. I just wish you’d see it
before another girl does because at the end of the day, everyone, including the
nice guy you don’t deserve, is rooting only for you.
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